Purse Power Pushers

Today is Thursday – which, consequently, is the day after Wednesday and the day before Friday – but that’s not what’s important right now. What is important, is today’s post topic – titled, as you’ve probably noticed, “Purse Power Pushers”, or PPP (a new acronym). While to the unacquainted this phrase makes about as much sense as using the escalator to get to the gym, it’s something that you have probably all encountered before.

Allow me to explain with a case in point. The other day i was walking in an aisle-way adjacent to the post office, when a large lady comes bambling (new word?) out of the post office entrance accelerating like a dog on a rug, looking down at her purse to insert a receipt or some change. The problem is, she wasn’t looking where she was going, and she almost slammed into me – corporate push-up bra and all. And that, my now-knowledgeable friend, is what a PPP is.

Sure – she was probably on the tail end of her lunch break with only milliseconds left to stand in line at the local Hungry Jacks (ala Burger King for the US readers) for a Bacon Deluxe Value Meal (with extra bacon, and a side of bacon) before her lunch break is over, but perhaps look where you’re going love! heh. Even though I don’t drive, I’m pretty sure I would’ve had right of way, because I was the one travelling down a central pedestrian traffic-way, and she’s the one merging into it from a post-office entrance doorway (road rule theories applied here).

But it’s not just in the city that you’ll encounter the corporate variety of powerful, glasses-wearing, high heels clacking, get-out-of-my-way-or-I’ll-squeeze-you-between-my-fake-b00bies, purse pushing lady. You also occasionally come across them at shopping centres. They’re the ones that abandon their trolleys in the middle of an aisle while they check out the latest special on a bulk buy of lemon zesters – which, as we all know, are about as useful as a snooze button on a smoke alarm. But it’s not all bad news – because some of them are nice (like the one who gets on the same bus stop as I do in the morning)… it’s just hard to find them sometimes, especially during lunchtime rush-hour. But – all good… just, maybe, like… look, before merging (like when driving) Oh, and then there’s the pool-table hogging Lezbots at The Beat. And what is it with the way they stand there with their arms positioned on the table like it contains a 400hp V8 engine?! It’s a pool-table, not a motorbike (inside joke; ask the group of friends ). No matter how manly a female-loving-female (or anyone, for that matter) may position ones self in, on, or adjacent to said pool-table, it’s going to go about as far as a lead balloon.

Speaking of The Beat (and also in other news), my mate Wes is back in AU after 5 or 6 months on a cruise ship doing A/V work… he has a tonne of photos to show me, so I’ll have to organise a photo-night with him soon. And he’s going out next weekend, which is good- cause so are we! I think we’re doing a Saturday night this time – which will be interesting …we haven’t been out on a Saturday night in ages! I think I’m looking forward to it? Not sure yet, lol.

And just before I go, make sure you watch this YouTube – it’s sooo funny ( and the fake sound-effects make it so much better).
Catch’ya =)